Best Ever Kale Chips


"Best Ever." I see this phrase, and variations of it, used liberally all over the internet. Everything seems to be the "best ever." A quick Google search for "best cookies ever," will land you with millions of results, but not necessarily what you're looking for. In Vancouver, a friend of mine once counted 6 "world's best pizza," signs within a 1km radius of each other. I have eaten the "best food in the city," at countless locations, all in the same city. Recently, my boyfriend and I embarked on a (fattening) quest to discover the best pizza in our area. What we've learned: we both have *very* different criteria when it comes to pizza. (I like thin crust, lots of sauce, little cheese - he likes the complete opposite. Clearly, our opinions differ greatly on which pizza is the best.) So how is it that so many places claim to be the "best ever?" I'll chalk this phenomenon up to two things: first, many people truly believe that they have the best *insert food name here* ever, based entirely on their own personal preferences. The second reason is that curiosity sells. People want to know - is it really the best ever? The thing is, it's a win/win situation: if it is the best ever, a-w-e-s-o-m-e! I just got to eat it! If it's not the best ever, I can ridicule those who think that it is, and I can fill the internet with my angry opinion!

Because #trolling.

All that being said, I'm here to tell you that these kale chips really are the best that *I* have ever had. They are crispy, umami, and not too salty. That's all a kale chip really needs in life, and that's what I'm here to share with you today.

Things to note before making this recipe
1. If you do not have a dehydrator, you *can* make these in the oven, as long as it's on the lowest setting. My oven goes down to 170F, which is only 10F higher than my dehydrator, and it works very well. If your oven only goes down to 200F or so, you'll have to check on them regularly, and continue flipping to make sure that they don't burn. If they start to brown, get out of town! (And by that, I mean take them out of the oven. They're done.)
2. Nutritional yeast has no substitute. Buy the flaked kind, not the powder. You can find it at most bulk stores, or at specialty health food stores. As it's rising in popularity, you can sometimes even find it in chain grocers in the "organic/health food" section.

So without further adieu, the humble, tasty, umami filled, nooch speckled, crispy, tangy, delicious kale chip.

The Best Ever Kale Chips 
a.k.a. Nutritional Yeast Kale Chips
a.k.a. Umami Kale Chips
a.k.a. Cheezy Vegan Kale Chips

ingredients

2 bunches of kale
2 tsp sesame oil
3 tsp soy sauce
1/4 cup nutritional yeast

method

Remove all stems from kale. All of them. Get them off of there! They have no place in the life of kale chips. Toss leaves in a large bowl with sesame oil and soy sauce. Massage into kale until all leaves are coated. Toss with nutritional yeast.

Place on dehydrator sheets (or on parchment-lined baking sheet) and dehydrate at 160F for 3 to 4 hours, or until they are crispy. If they are in the oven, put your oven to it's lowest setting, and bake, turning about once every 30 minutes, about 2 to 3 hours, or until crisp.

Note: Smaller pieces will crisp up faster - feel free to remove them earlier to snack on while you're waiting. I highly encourage this.










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